Damp Tassels...

I was wearing an oft' admired grey poncho this morning. It wasn't exactly like Clint's, for starters I wash mine! Clint's, I understand, was never washed, urghhh! Anyhoo mine has tassels. Get me, fashion goddess!

I was feeling rather swish for 7:30am, poncho, boots with a heel rather than my trademark wellingtons, AND I had lipstick on, albeit that it was on my lips and my cheeks [face] as I couldn't find a blusher. I was lookin' good. I even managed to carry a porcelain teacup (it's my favourite,) filled with thick black sugary coffee, to the car. Coffee in one hand, bright orange Halloween bucket of mixed corn in the other hand [WHAT?....OK, OK, image ruined!]

I loaded the sprogs into the car for school and placed the gorgeous steaming cup of coffee on the roof of said vehicle while I went to open up and feed the chooks.

I know what you're thinking....... and you're wrong, I did not sashay back to the car forgetting that the coffee was on the roof, thus smashing my lovely tea cup to smithereens when I drove off, .... No, that was last week.... and the week before! No, I remembered it was there and placed the precious vessel in the cup holder that tolerates my cup but that would prefer a diet coke shaped drink.

There is a certain amount of off-roading to be done after we leave the comfort of our drive. There is a short strip of concrete from the front door to the stables and this is where our equine guests get washed, but out on the bridle path, the track that leads to the cross country tarmac road, we have to navigate Michigan lake-like potholes. I'm always nervous in case one turns out to be Vicar of Dibley size and the car is swallowed whole!

Along this stretch the trick is to pick the cup up out of the holder and balance it in your hand, trying to absorb the worst of the seismic activity. There must be some scientific explanation to this shock absorption but I read Art at Uni with a side order of 'dying one's hair,' so I couldn't hope to impart anything serious regarding this phenomenon.

All was well, we made it to the road; I wasn't wearing my coffee and the sprogs, unpeturbed by the usual gait of the car, were busy learning spellings and French vocab. I took a welcome gulp of nectar and placed the cup back in its holder.

Who'd have thought that poncho tassels made of a wool mix could be so thirsty. By the time I went for another slurp, the coffee had been filched by my cape. A damp patch on the material looked like Australia, plus I smelled like Starbucks! Sucking the coffee out doesn't work, all the wool bits get stuck in your teeth.

Poncho wash day here I come... Oh if anyone has Clint's number tell him I'm putting a wash on, he might want me to do his too.....







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My guilty little pleasure....

On her last visit to The Larches, The Entrepreneur looked at me in a concerned way and implored; 'Don't go feral here will you?' This was purely because I'd mentioned that I couldn't find my Epilady. Maybe she thought I'd grow hair to my knees in the country air!

Several weeks on from that conversation (no hair showing yet) and 15 miles in distance I have discovered shops....(nervous giggle.) There's a big Tesco. When I say big, I don't mean by superstore standards but it does stock a few clothes, has a cafe and pharmacy and way more food lines than the quaint Tesco in Ludlow! There's a tiny Department store in the town too. I walked in and was greeted by the familiar sparkle and aroma of the make-up and perfume dept. I've missed those girls, those sun kissed, pouty-lipped advisors on skin tone and blush.

Sadly I was only shopping for rugby boots and wellingtons, but hey, it's shopping!

Seeing myself in the bright store mirrors reminded me that I really must start paying attention to my appearance. In the past, throwing on a pair of old jeans, strapping into a Rigby and Peller and slapping on a bit of lipstick was all that was required. At 44, I'm still attempting this but unfortunately I now look like Tracey Emin's Bed. I desire to look 'interesting' rather than 'deranged.' A re-think is required.

So far I'm on day 8 of the 'drain your system of alcohol' experiment. Feeling good actually, spurred on by a tiny bit of weight loss and good sleep (thank you children.) I really never expected to last a week. I have drawn up another 21 days on my white board....hmmmmm, we'll see....