Friday 6 December 2013

Radioactive Food... Yum!

The boy and the girl have been sickly and at home. Fortunately the illness was more soaring temperatures, lethargy and a cough rather than the gastro-thing that is doing the rounds. As of this evening, I think we are all mended. Phew!

The main baby-sitter during this period has been the telly. Normally we Archer-parents are mean with the goggle box; rationing the kids to Saturday and Sunday night TV, but during sickly times the TV is a welcome distraction.

Boy had been watching an old sci-fi film yesterday about a black hole in space and robots, c. 1960, I was in the kitchen finding stuff to tempt his appetite when he wandered in in his PJ's.

'What's gammon? he enquired.

Pleased that he might be interested in a ham dinner with potatoes, cheese sauce and broccoli, I began the Wiki-version of gammon and other lush pork cuts. Hugh Fearnley-Whittenstall, Nigel Slater and Adam Henson would all have been so proud.

At the end of my monologue he looked dazed, confused and in need of more ibuprofen.

'Why would it be radioactive then? he asked.

Ohhhhhhh..[lightbulb]........ Gamma!

Moral: We must be sure of the question, before we give the answer. My friend once frightened the bee***us out of her young triplets when they asked a vague question about babies. Turns out they were really only interested in a vague notion of the subject and didn't need the technical terms. A week later and the same mum overheard an indignant conversation between two mums at the school gates, whose children had also picked up the bio-speak a year or two early.... whoops.

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