Never Clean Your Car!

Invited to lunch recently, by a lovely girl friend, I heard a funny story. Well, it's funny depending on who you are really. My pal has given me full permission to repeat the tale.....

My friends are having some building work undertaken. All day, builders arrive with vans and lorries to disrupt their life. Their house is beautiful, and will be more so, after the builders leave. They are fortunate to have one particularly delightful builder, and he seems to be driving the project along at speed.

As a distraction from the renovation, my pal got out in her garden with a tray of sunflowers to plant. Close to her outside wall, she noticed a jar. Assuming that some passing yob had lobbed said jar into her garden, she went to recover it.

It was someones ashes! The name was right there on the casket! It was the ashes of a dead lady!

How dreadful. My pal confessed to feeling a bit bored that day. This was a bit of excitement! She phoned the council and asked them to immediately come to collect the body/ashes.

'When the man came to the door, I did ham it up a tadge!' she confessed. 'I told him I was utterly traumatised.'

The man from the council put on his most serious face. He took the ashes with reverence and promised to investigate.

Later, having tracked down the family, he drove to the next of kin. The daughter of the deceased opened the door. She was understandably upset.

Unfortunately the daughter of the deceased is married to my friend's favourite builder. ....... He'd been cleaning out his van on my friend's drive, and had forgotten to put his mother-in-law away..... Whoops, such an easy mistake to make, surely?

I understand that building work may slow considerably in the foreseeable future.